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My Holy Grail

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I've been on a quest for some time. I've been trying to integrate my spirituality into a modern scientific and rational framework. It's become this obsessive need for it all to make sense. Sometimes I envy those who require no justification for their faith; those who have no need to logically discern fact from myth, but can simply be in the moment and take comfort in their faith in God. Or maybe I could be equally comfortable as a non-believer who dismisses it all as primitive superstition. But I'm in an unenviable position: I have personally felt the presence of God. I KNOW that God and spirit are real. But I can't prove it, and it's driving me mad. I want to have a response to skeptics like Richard Dawkins or Christopher Hitchens. I want to be able to defend my faith with fact. At the same time, I also have all this New Age fluff around me, and I want to discern what is real from what is flakey nonsense. I am both a believer and a skeptic, and I must have the best of both worlds.

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